Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
