Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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