I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
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