Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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