i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Randomize
