I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
