just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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