I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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