If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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