you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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