Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
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