unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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