got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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