what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
