The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
