Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
