the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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