The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize