and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I had to cum in my sink.
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