My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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