He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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