Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
