i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
