3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
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