I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
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