Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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