We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
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Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
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Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
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