Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Randomize
