Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I have aggressive nipples.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
