I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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