I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Randomize
