It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
