Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
