Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Shame - the story of my life.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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