She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
