I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
