I just cut my nipple shaving
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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