i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
