Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
