Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
