Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
then he tried to convert me to islam
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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