Who did Billy Mays play for?
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
