Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
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