I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You took a bar mat shot.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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