You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
