My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
