i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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