Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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