Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
