Sponge bath it is.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
