can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
