I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
